Fifty Shades of Grey

Allow me to tell you about Fifty Shades of Grey.

50 shades of grey

Yes, I read it, and naturally, I have a few thoughts.

First of all, the story is less than compelling, but I think that’s pretty typical for this kind of book. OK, I guess it’s somewhat compelling–it did hold my interest, and I read the 500+ pages in just a few nights. Essentially, it’s a romance novel, and while I’m sure there are romance novels out there with great story lines, this one’s pretty basic.

Christian Grey, a young, successful, HOT, multi-millionaire with a disturbed past meets and falls for the innocent Anastasia, inviting her to enter into a dominant/submissive relationship with him, which includes a contract and a non-disclosure agreement. Not turn ons for me, but I suppose there are people who like legal documents with their sex.

Anastasia, who’s never had a boyfriend let alone slept with anyone, is so intrigued by Christian that she actually entertains this idea, not really knowing what she’s getting into. Ignoring the fact that neither of the main characters are particularly likeable, it’s just really hard to wrap your head around this scenario. I mean, you’re a virgin and you want to go straight to the sexual Olympics??? Then again, it is essentially porn, and any porn I’ve ever seen isn’t exactly plausible. Like–wait, what? They’re doing what???

So, yeah. This is like that, but in a book.

Let me just say, I felt like something of a sexual anthropologist reading this book. I mean, the whole thing really is fascinating, and I’ll admit, pretty hot.


  • The main character, Ana, is a 21 year old college senior who has never had sex or even, ahem, “touched herself.” I find her sexual naivety to be slightly hard to believe, but OK, I guess this is plausible. The thing I don’t understand is how she could be completely inexperienced, only to be deflowered by Mr. Grey and have orgasm after orgasm. I mean, yes, it’s impressive, but not very realistic.
  • The book isn’t particularly well-written. I’m no literary critic, but it was clear to me that this was a middle-aged British author trying to write American college-aged characters without researching. I mean, the girls say things like, “I’ll go fetch it,” in conversation. No one here talks like that. At one point, Ana asks Grey not to be cross with her. We don’t speak like that here in the good ol’ US of A. Sorry. So that bugged me.
  • In spite of myself, I did like their flirty exchanges and part of me really did want for him to not be so screwed up so they could have a normal relationship. The potential was definitely there, if not for him being a complete lunatic.
  • The fact that she wasn’t more disturbed by his need to control her was disturbing to me. At times, his need for control made me nervous for her, and all I could think of was how predatory and abusive he could be. That, coupled with her naivety, did kind of freak me out.
  • *SPOILER ALERT* I liked the ending–mostly because she finally told him to get his sh*t together and left. It was realistic, and I liked that she stood up for herself. It was about damn time.

Complaints aside, Fifty Shades kept me up late into the night reading, so I didn’t hate it. In fact, I was incredibly entertained in the same way I am by all things Kardashian. All in all, I liked Fifty Shades–a lot–despite its shortcomings.

Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey?


26 thoughts on “Fifty Shades of Grey

  1. hhrunner says:

    I love a trashy romance novel from time to time. Completely mind-numbing and unrealistic? Yes. But that doesn’t stop me from devouring them on occasion.

  2. The second one is pretty good, too…but the third…well, I finished it only because I wanted to know what happened…but the plot just seemed weird to me and it didn’t keep my interest as much as the first two.

  3. robfiasco says:

    i don’t see why you had to be so cross in your review. i think i’ll go fetch some other reviews and see if they’re any better. Brilliant! :)

  4. I’m glad you wrote about this! I’ve been wondering if I should read it or not. I’m sure that I would actually enjoy the sexiness of it, but I wish it had a better story line! Do you think you’ll read the next ones in the series?

  5. I am sooo glad you wrote this Melissa! My mom just ordered the book and I am planning on reading it after her… becuase it’s there, I have heard of the “forbiden” nature around it and now I have to read it for myself!

  6. OK this is good, thanks for the summary and your thoughts. My girlfriends were e-mailing about this, contemplating it as the next book club book. I think it would make me upset to read about the poor little submissive girl, but that makes me happy that she was able to pick it up at the end and stand up for herself. So maybe I’ll give it a chance.

    And PS I love having an idea of what’s going to happen at the end of a book, before I read it, because it makes me feel a little more relaxed hahaha.

  7. Thanks for the review! From all the attention it’s been getting as “mommy porn” I was completely not interested. But hearing more about it (and your Kardashian analogy) has me curious. I might just check it out!

      • – I may be doing my first gig. When you are doing the inside shots, dunirg the and reception, are you using flash? If I asked you specific questions about specific shots here would you be willing to chat with me just a smidge? Thanks!/eNovember 16, 2010 9:25 AM

  8. I have bought this book and I after hearing about all the hype, I am dying to devour it. But I am so dang busy right now with packing, moving, and new home projects it is on the back burner for just a bit. I do think it is hilariously that the media is referencing it as ‘Mommy Porn’….ha! Way to market…brillant really!

    • Yeah–keep it for when you have time. Otherwise, you’ll be reading when you have other shit to do and the people around you will get irritated. *foresees future*


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